The Life I Chose to live

     Well... It's been a time of major change mentally, emotionally, and physically. Life has taken some crazy turns lately, but it seems to be turning out really well for us. About a month ago Joey decided to go MIA on us for nearly a week. This caused Brandi and I both to do a bit of digging on his whereabouts. We weren't exactly thrilled. But then his ex boss actually reached out to me and filled me in on information I definitely did not know... Including but not limited to a girlfriend and child.      Well long story short, Brandi and I both decided enough was enough. We put an end to our relationship with Joey. And I'm here to tell you, it was the best decision either of us have made in a long time. I had forgotten how free it feels to be free. Not having to play 21 questions 3 times a day.. or repeat myself 20 times ..  and it has felt amazing to not be in emotional distress half the week trying to prove myself to someone that either doesn't listen or doesn't

     Can I start by saying... this year is flying by. It seems like just yesterday we were celebrating little Ms. Jordyn's third birthday. And now here we are approaching May.     But May contains a lot of big milestones for our family. Our oldest (Raymon) will be graduating. That in it's self is a huge accomplishment. We both worked our buts off to see that day come. When he first came to me, he had already missed a year of school. He had nowhere near the credits required to graduate on any level. He had no dream or ambition. But now look at my little butterfly. We sat down with the school counselor two years ago and made a plan and got him on track. And now he is working so hard to get into a welding program and further his education. Proud is an understatement!    Levi has done a 360 too. He is now on track to graduate with a public service achievement. And his goal for after graduation next year is to join the military and obtain his CDL. He has come a long way from the lit

    Yesterday was by far one of the worst days I have had in a very long time. Normally when I say I have had a bad day it means the kids have drove me crazy or something simple breaks causing an inconvenience. No! Yesterday was a bad day.      Let's start with the fact of nearly waking up too late to get the kids on the school bus. I guess due to being up late dealing with sinus drainage, I didn't hear my alarm. So there I was all scatter brained and rushing kids out the door. I was running almost 20 minutes late and the kids were just minutes from missing the bus.     Then let's add the fact that I had a vet appointment for Bridget. That actually went pretty well until the worlds biggest German Sheppard scared the crap out of her and caused her to go into an anxiety attack. And when I say this dog was huge, I mean huge. The damn thing was bigger than I am by a long shot. He gave me anxiety. But poor little 19 pound Bridget was terrified. Her muscles were so tense, she ben

     Finally I'm starting to feel myself again. By that I mean I'm no longer on pain meds and sleeping with my face wrapped in an ice pack. Everything else is still an adjustment. I've been experimenting with foods to find out what I can and can't eat. For comfort reasons I am adjusting when and how long I wear my dentures... and I have definitely been trying different types of adhesive. That is definitely not a one size fit all category. I personally hate the feel of adhesive so I will be trying thermoplastic in the very near future.    And thankfully, these are not my permanent teeth. I definitely do not like the feel of plastic and I'm glad I chose porcelain. The plastic may look good, but it doesn't have anywhere near the density that I was expecting. Even chewing is a task. I guess that is why I am looking forward to July. July 21st to be exact. I finally go to be fitted for my final set. YAY!

     You would think after nearly 9 months I would have found a way to be okay with the fact that my grandma is gone. But somehow just as I think I'm okay she finds a way back into my mind and I want to scream and cry.. I guess I haven't really allowed myself to mourn the way I should. In my defense, I don't really have anyone to sit and talk about her with either. The family we share aren't a part of my life... asides from my auntie Le that is taking it just as hard as I am.     I guess that's why I'm here talking about her. To share with the world what an amazing woman she was.    Anyone who laid eyes on her could see the obvious. She was beautiful, intelligent, and bold. But what you can't see is that she hid her pain from the world. Her story isn't one from a novel where the princess got the prince and lived happily ever after. Nor is she the scorned woman full of hatred from the life she was dealt. She is the survivor. She met my grandpa in Vietnam

     Just when you think the growing up is paused for just a second, life reminds you that your baby isn't a baby anymore.  Damian is growing up to be such an intelligent little man. We are barely into the second semester of his second grade year and this little guy comes parading in carrying his library book. I take a look at it and it's at grade level 2.9.    For those of you that aren't up to code on what that means, the first number is grade reading level. The second number is the progress level within that grade level. So long story short he is reading at nearly a 3rd grade level already. I'm so proud of him... but I'm also wondering how long I can hold on to him before he decides he's not my baby anymore. 😔