The Big Day

    Yes, I know. I have a lot of "Big" days. But today is the biggest of them all... so far. Today in just about an hour I go to court. (No, I'm not in any legal trouble.) Today is the day that a judge gets to make his final call on Delaney. After speaking with nearly half a dozen people last week to get a feel for what may happen most everyone seems to believe that the judge will in fact give me full custody. But worst case scenario he will grant me permanent guardianship until her 18th birthday. Either way she will be placed with me. 

    The part that makes this so exciting is that it will be finalized. She won't have to wonder every day for the rest of her childhood where home is. That is one of the many reasons I took her in to begin with. No child should ever wonder where they will lay their head to sleep from one day to the next. She had endured that enough already in her 12 years on this earth. The least I could do was give her a place to call home, where people love her, somewhere she could feel safe. 

   It took nearly a year to get to a point where she no longer calls this a house.. she calls it home. She feels safe, loved, and wanted. She sent me a text this morning after she left for school. I can tell she is worried even over text. She wished me luck today and hoped that all goes well. After watching the camera feed from last night, I seen that she barely slept at all. I know from talking with her last week that she thinks her mother will mess this up for her. She doesn't want to leave or risk ever being taken from my home. I can understand her worries. 

    Once years ago I was her. I remember not getting a wink of sleep for days before court wondering if the following court date the judge would yank me from my safety zone. Wondering if that would be the day they would send me so far away that I would never see my family again. And I remember on several of those court dates they did take me away from the place I called home. It's a scary place for a child to be. All I have been able to do is comfort her and guarantee her that I will not stop fighting for her.

    Even I couldn't sleep well last night. I woke up every two hours only to see it was nowhere near time to be up. I truly believe the judge will make the right call... but there is always that small percentage of a chance that they may not. So wish us luck today. I'll be sure to post an update once it's all said and done.